ECW Results 11/03/09: The Nickel – Vance Archer Takes Aim On Arrival, The Perfect Storm, Benjamin vs. Ryder III, and Captain Faces Mutiny…Again

(Image Credit: TWD Media)

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Regal Beats The System: Well, so much for showing us that you “run” the show Tiffany, Captain Charisma granting Sir Regal an ECW Championship match in England next week just goes to show that both he and the relentless Englishman do really control the land of Extreme.

I know she’s the GM of Tuesday nights, and it’s all scripted, but my goodness this woman is really made out to look really ridiculous. I’m starting to think Estrada had more credibility.

First she stated ECW was involved in Bragging Rights, then her “No title shot for Regal” got vetoed by the ECW champion and Regal himself! Tiffany just stood with her arm sling after Christian told her he’s giving Regal a shot at the belt. Regal declined, and said it’ll have to be in front of a deserving crowd–like England–next week, and he got his wish.

Tiffany finally showed her power at the end of the segment by putting Regal in action against Goldust in the first match of the night. Now that Regal has finally gotten his title shot in England will he finally win the belt from the current longest reigning male champion in WWE?

With the  homecoming for the sinister Regal, the stars seemed aligned and the champagne may already be fizzing, but Christian should never be counted out. The Captain faces mutiny again.

Dust En Route To England:  Regal and Goldust put on a solid bout and Goldust was very over as usual. Regal’s heat started to kick in when he started to get really aggressive with Goldust, who was aggressive with him as well. The match was fairly good. though it was obvious that Goldust was going to end up on his back via Regal’s knee trembler.

Striving Standards: Somehow, Shelton Benjamin continues to work this face push despite having the rug was pulled out from under him via  Sheamus’ departure to RAW and the unnecessary loss that came with it. I called for a “Benjamin depressed” angle where he questions his career. Benjamin appeared to an increasing pop with a smile on his face as if last week never happened. (That’s what I’m talking about!)

Zack Ryder meets Benjamin for Ryder vs. Benjamin III with The Gold Standard already up 2-0. Prior to the match, Rosa Mendez talked Ryder to death, but he was so infatuated with her that he actually had a fantasy while she spoke to him. Mendez is basically the Jillian Hall of ECW minus the singing.

She got to announce the matchup between the two. Why is she announcing the match? Let Mayhew do it, the more practice the better for the woman.

Matthews is sounding ten times better, as if he spent the whole week taking tips from Striker, and Saxton is one smooth talker. Those two complimented Benjamin as usual.

The match was going nowhere fast though “Let’s Go Shelton” chants filled the arena. Ryder kept Benjamin grounded for a while before Benjamin exploded with offense which included a wicked belly to belly suplex. Just as things began to pick up the match ended; Ryder’s crush on Mendez took a turn for the worse.

Mr. Woo Woo Woo battled Shelton from inside the ring. Benjamin front flipped from the apron into the ring, while Ryder drooled over Mendez putting on lip gloss. Shelton stood behind him smiling and hit Paydirt for the end. I wonder where this Ryder inflation will lead to? What happened to his girlfriend in Long Island? At least Benjamin was over well tonight.

The Perfect Storm: This was the hands down the best part of the show. Paul Burchill came out to address the crowd about Hurricane being a phony.

Before he could finish his verbal onslaught, Hurricane swooped to the scene coming out with his green and black light saber-like kendo stick. Burchill told him Halloween is over, and Helms said some people like to celebrate all year, like Katie Lea. Burchill kept the Ripper within him for the time being, and challenged Hurricane to one last match.

If Hurricane wins, he must unmask himself for the fraud he is and if Burchill loses, he and Katie Lea must leave ECW. This is a win-win. Burchill loses and he and Katie are finally out of ECW! If Burchill wins, he gets to expose and go over Hurricane Helms. I’m very much looking forward to this future match.

Washington is Golden: Remember how Abe never appeared if he didn’t have a show with a guest? He didn’t have a show this week, but got a segment. This isn’t the first time, ECW needs Abe Washington and so do we deep down inside. The folks are starting to pick up on Washington, the man is just damn hilarious. Without Striker to do battle with,  Abe practically has the line of the night in the bag.

Table On Deck: The Roundtable’s muscle came aboard to give Christian and Yoshi Tatsu some trouble. There was nothing special here, the match was average.

Yoshi was isolated for most of the match by Zeke and Kozlov, until Christian got some action via a Tatsu hot tag. Christian became a problem for Kozlov and Zeke and was wiped out by Yoshi, who vaulted over the ropes onto him. How come he can catch Dreamer but not Yoshi?

Kozlov’s situation was all too familar. After his fall away slam, he charged to the turnbuckle. Christian dodged and hit him with a huge DDT after Kozlov knocked his head on the turnbuckle.

He waited for the Soviet Cyborg to get to his feet, and cut the lights with the Killswitch. Match over. Regal and Roundtable completly destroyed Christian yet again, weakening him up for next week in England. Christian was out cold on the ground, getting a Regal stretch for his troubles.

Edge Of The Nickel

Vance Archer: I may have marked for this guy already. Archer, also known as Lance Hoyt, finally arrived in the land of Extreme after a funny segment between Tony Atlas and Abraham Washington. His stare is cold and badass and his look is badass, it’s a shame his finisher wasn’t (reverse DDT).

He had a squash match against a local jobber, who received a pop matching his. Just the name Archer reminds me my favorite DC  hero The Green Arrow.  There is no relation and I’ll need to see more from the heel Archer as well.

Tails

RAW and Batista vs. Rey Recaps: Do I need to explain? The entire Osbourne RAW night was recapped minus the main event. as well as Batista and his feud with Rey Mysterio.

Line Of The Night

“He done made me lose my rent-a-center deposit! It wasn’t even in my name, it was in my momma’s name you know I got bad credit!” - Abraham Washington speaking on William Regal destroying his show’s set.

“The Emerald Skywalker has arrived” - An honorable mention for Josh Matthews during Hurricane’s entrance.

Extreme Eight:

1) William Regal (High Jumper)

2) Christian

3) Yoshi Tatsu

4) Shelton Benjamin

5) Ezekiel Jackson & Vladimir Kozlov

6) Paul Burchill (Heating Up)

7) Hurricane Helms

Abraham Washington